lesson 1:

Anti-personnel mines are the only piece of military hardware not constantly upgraded. This is because they are intended to be weapons of fear and chaos. Making them too modern would cause them to kill too effectively. There are two schools of thought on creating the perfect land mine: one, is to only maim your target forcing their friends to come to their rescue putting themselves at risk. The second, is to create a mess so horrible you almost wish you had a friend bleeding to death in your arms instead of picking them out of your hair. Lovers can be a little like that. No matter how you lose them, be in a giant mess or a quiet moan, you always wish you could have them back.

lesson 2:

The only reason we have super glue is that it was originally intended as an emergency field suture to prevent our soldiers from bleeding to death. The project was a partial success. The compound kept soldiers from bleeding out the only problem: it poisoned their blood, killed them anyway. Romance can be a little like that: The fastest way to kill a relationship that isn’t going too well is to try too hard to fix it.

lesson 3:

When faced with a napalm bomb it is not the flame you need initially fear it’s the moment of combustion itself. Creating that much fire uses up so much oxygen it can literally suck your lungs dry when you reflexively breathe back in. The incoming air will be super heated it will sear the inside of your lungs. This will be the last breath you ever take. Goodbyes are exactly like that. No matter how ready for them you think you are, they always catch you with your mouth open, leave you with a thousand things you still want to say. You will never get the chance.

Advertisements